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| No one should expect the working class of Los Rojiblancos to have turkey with the elite class of Los Blancos. Unfortunate for humanity, but fortunate for football. |
Blame TNP, don't blame me
Unlike what happened recently, you shouldn't hold yours truly responsible if your favourite Madrid loses by tomorrow. The reason being why is that Deadpool doesn't play on either side. The only reason why he would join the X-Force may be down to Cable himself (just don't ask me whether Nathan Summers drives a Porsche or Jeep Cherokee). And yes, I know T.J "he made Weasel looks German" Miller may have made Liverpool even more famous at this point of time.
Just don't ask me whether Sazae is actually Korean just because you see Korean subtitles above.
3 areas highlighted by TNP-Formation
Since TNP may have given me something to work on, I might as well expand upon what is being written thus far. After all, upgrading is a very S'porean thing. And that includes bloggers. At least for me anyway since I don't go around reading other people's blogs for fun.
First, we have the formation. As a Spanish team, Los Rojiblancos actually play more like the English. In fact, the Los Rojiblancos approach is no different from the Leicester approach. The irony? El Lobo actually did that way before Il Volpe (note that I don't use La Volpe due to gender difference) took over the Foxes of England.
As a 4-4-2 team, Los Rojiblancos will always play deep. Win the ball+defend the ball=the winning XI. Straightforward, yes. Easy to deal with? Not really. If I know what you're thinking, it means I would have already limited your options beforehand. You may say there's only this much 4-4-2 can do for El Lobo, but it merely means Simeone knows this cold hard truth as well (which is why I always say he's Heather Chua's worst nightmare ever since the last genius to grace that ITE stage). It's called using the opponent's analysis against himself, it's basically reverse psychology in layman terms. Lest we forget, El Lobo is El Lobo. You don't call him El Perro (to those who understand Spanish, no Korean jokes pls. We Asians are already buckling under our very own dog-eat-dog educational environment).
As for Los Blancos, Zizou did the right thing by shoring up the defence. During José "O Especial" Mourinho's time, a certain Pepe (not to be confused with the Chinese name Pei Pei) once had a problem. That problem had a name and a different nationality, his name is Raphaël Varane and he's French. This time round, the tables are turned. No longer Pepe is the one having a problem. Rather, he's now having no problem playing under Le Professeur X even though he's a French. By adopting a 4-3-3, Zizou has created a strategy hinging heavily on controlling the game from the back. With a solid back 4 and Casemiro being the 5th man, is it any wonder that Real Madrid is now looking like the real deal of Europe ever since Vicente "doesn't think like van Gogh" del Bosque showed El Dinero what would eventually happen come 2010 and 2012?
Key players
I decided that there's only this much TNP can do for me in terms of shielding the blame. After all, the atmosphere at San Siro will be all about winners taking all. Sounds like the Milan derby, but the difference lies in what is literal (cup final derby) and what is figurative (i.e. league derby). Let us see Los Tres Amigos for who they really are.
First amigo on the list? Casemiro. If the referee is to be the 12th man of Camp Nou, then Casemiro will always be the 5th man of the Real backline. Zizou's tactic is basically two-fold. Discipline and responsibility, freedom and expression. The former is all about the defence. You can score like an army from Catalonia or an elite force from Bavaria, but you'll still lose if the opposition can hold fort like what the Rohirrim did during the Battle of the Hornburg. This lad may be young (he's actually 24), but that doesn't prevent him from being that Roy "take that, you *bleep*!" Keane of the moment. Of course, I'd like to include Patrick "the black Schwarzenegger (no racist jokes pls, I know a bit of German btw)" Vieira as well. Sadly, we already got Paul "Le Chevalier Noir" Pogba taking that claim.
Our second amigo on the list will be Gareth "the Batman" Bale. If Cristiano "yes, I know Brazilians speak Portuguese as well" Ronaldo is the Superman of Los Blancos, then Bale is that other DC character made even more famous by another Bale of Wales. He may not be that 超サイヤ人ゴッド we all are seeing in the image above, but that also means we shouldn't call Belinda "tak benci" Bencic as the next Martina "not Martini" Hingis. Let alone Angelique "Die Engel" Kerber when it comes to Steffi "Die Greif" Graf. Mark my words, GB11 has (and will) always be the Batman to CR7's Superman. He doesn't take the limelight by storm in the same way his partner has always done, but this dynamic duo is arguably the reason why Los Blancos are scoring like the stereotypical white guy in St James (I mean the local power station, not the foreign park).
There's a reason why this meme is smaller in size. It has got nothing to with the 3rd amigo coming from the wrong end of Madrid. Rather, this is the only size available. The other memes I found were basically Spanish and I don't want to elitise myself (forget about the Oxford dictionary, forget about asking Emma "Duchess of Megawatts" Watson whether such a word exists. There's no such word as elitise, it's a word in my own dictionary). Enough about attention grabbing, I'm not interested in getting myself into jail just because I made a joke at the expense of the SPG culture. Saúl "he ain't any son of Kish" Ñíguez may easily become the joker in Simeone's hand. He's young (3 yrs younger than Casemiro fyi), he's most likely hungry now, and he's definitely raring to fly off from a gun's barrel. One solo wonder goal doesn't make a hero, but we can also say that Greedo wasn't the reason why Han Solo is... well, Han Solo. The class may be there, but can Saúl keep up the momentum? After all, Turan is now chilling out under the Catalan sun.
Simeone is not only famous for wringing out that extra 100% from his charges, a darker side of him actually entails the kind of ruthlessness not even seen in the likes of Sir A.Fergie and the new foreign boss of Man Utd. You most likely won't need to be someone like Simeone's celebrity victim to get yourself off his good books.
Simeone is not only famous for wringing out that extra 100% from his charges, a darker side of him actually entails the kind of ruthlessness not even seen in the likes of Sir A.Fergie and the new foreign boss of Man Utd. You most likely won't need to be someone like Simeone's celebrity victim to get yourself off his good books.
Simeone is, without a doubt, the greatest trolling god to grace the footballing world ever since the English first invented the game (I mean football, not trolling). There is nothing trollolol about being not good enough, however. In a certain sense, El Lobo actually thinks like a local Singaporean more than any foreign talents we're having now. If you're not good enough, off you go on loan. If I can recoup any amount of dinero once the season ends, I'll do so. His ruthless nature is nothing like what I've seen in the likes of Sir A.Fergie, the new Ud boss, or his apprentice at my beloved Boro. I don't have to spell it out for you whether Simeone will have his own son of Jesse ready in case a certain somebody decided to be the son of Kish. Ultimately, the most pressing question is this:
Will the #FootballTrollingGod start with Saúl?
VIP mention
I don't know what's wrong with people nowadays. As a player, CR7 is no Stevie G or that white Paul. Neither is he Raúl as well. The barracking is now looking (and sounding) stupid. No player is bigger than the club, so what are you all thinking? Like it or not, Madridistas or not, CR7 will always have a trick up his sleeve. In the current footballing world, I rate only 3 players as quite literally out of this planet.
While I wish I can be Boro's Messi in the technical area, such a wish can wait for another day. CR7 really has that unique ability to raise his game for a seemingly lost cause. His pace may have faded a wee bit, but do not underestimate a charismatic player of his calibre. Whether he's able to take the fight straight into Los Rojiblancos will be an interesting point of analysis. In fact, the only way for him to do it is to attack the backline while entrenched deeply in their own half. If Los Blancos need to win, someone has to be daring enough to do a 1 vs 4.
Whether his own country really needs Le Benz, I do not know. What I do know, however, is the fact that his team (and also fellow countryman) needs him. In order to facilitate the kind of ruthless aggression Batman and Superman are so famous for, we need an offensive anchor up front. This is where Le Benz comes in. A lot has been said on his scoring prowess, but I need to highlight his pace and holding up play as well. At the age of 28, he's starting to hit what we call a footballer's peak (i.e. 28-32). He will be the one leading the charge, not Batman or Superman. Therefore, the onus for Los Blancos is to create multiple goal outlets where the threat can come from anywhere just outside the D-cup area. Los Blancos is a team thriving on offensive aggression where the front 3 are anything but a Lonesome George.
Not to be confused with the human Coke, Koke is basically the most dangerous amigo in Los Rojiblancos. Xavi once lauded him as his heir apparent. Given the kind of player Xavi is, it's quite easy for us to discern what's so dangerous about Koke. Capable of operating out wide or in the central midfield, this is a player blessed with shrewd vision. It's not every day we get to see a ball-passing machine capable of playing out wide. In a Xavi sense, he's no winger. You can try putting players like Xavi, Alonso, and Scholes out wide. It will backfire spectacularly (last time I checked, someone actually put Scholes out wide on the left to accommodate Stevie and Frank in the centre. Possibly the reason why Scholes decided to rage quit). No such risk for Koke. The difference between passing the ball from the flank and doing the same thing from the centre lies in the options. If you're playing wide, there's only one way to pass the ball. And that is sideway. If you're passing the ball from the central region, that's where the ball can go anywhere like a heat seeking missile. If Koke isn't the kind of player possessing a higher level of strategic awareness than the likes of Xavi, Alonso, and Scholes, then you might as well expect Lonesome George to have a girlfriend. The only catch? Lonesome George actually died without a girlfriend.
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